The past few days I've been making a mental list of things to avoid like the plague while Tom's gone. There's nothing inherently wrong with these things. I just feel like they may make time go slower or make me more emotional than I'd like. I like to feel like I'm in control, because in all honesty, there are so many things going on in our lives and I have very little control.
1. Chick-flicks & books (including PS I Love You--I had watched that right before news he would be deploying)...although, since Tom's not a huge chick-flick fan, this would be a great time to reconsider adjusting the order of my Netflix queue.
2. Romantic songs
3. Too much down-time/free-time(the busier I am, the better)
4. Reading a copy of the Serenity Prayer, or Footsteps in the Sand
5. Visiting his extended family and having to explain our situation
I'm sure this list will grow, but these are all I can remember at the moment.
Things I worry about:
1. Collin-he starts kindergarten next year, and it's up to me about placement, goals & if any main-streaming will be attempted. Right now, he's doing a lot of babbling that we can't understand. He doesn't know how to: answer yes/no questions, say "my name is collin" by himself without me prompting the whole phrase, his age, feelings, or how to answer "how are you?", count to 20, write ABC's, recognize lowercase letters. If he were to be in kindergarten right now, he'd stick out like a sore thumb. I sure have my work cut out for me.
2. The kids being cranky/missing Tom the entire time he's gone.
3. Higher separation anxiety issues with all 3 kids.
4. Not getting enough "me time" (see #3, above)
5. Not being able to sleep good at night. I have never slept well on other(much shorter) trips he's taken. Every little sound at night makes me feel paranoid. The longest we've been at home without Tom is 2 weeks.
6. Not being able to keep up with everything and being burned out or me being perpetually cranky
7. Dropping huge amount of weight(I'm talking over 15 lbs here). That'll be interesting with my hypoglycemia. Last time he was gone(North Carolina, this summer), I ended up eating after the kids eat and was losing like 1-2 lbs per day the first few days. I can't even fathom the next 9 months.
Journey: n. An experience or process that leaves you changed; trail of experience. From here to there.
2 comments:
Hey Mindy. Is Tom gone already? I didn't quite catch when he deploys, how long he'll be gone and where he is going.
FYI, I experienced this same thing while my ex was in Saudi Arabia. You're absolutely right about needing to stay busy.
I had a wise Stake President that gave me a million projects and programs to work on that year. I look back now and see that it gave me experiences I could have never had if my husband was home.
Tom's already started his training at San Pedro/Long Beach Harbor. He gets to come home every night while he's training there. After this Saturday, he goes down to San Diego for a couple months. Then he will be overseas(likely Kuwait) for 6 months, although now there's talk of 7 months.
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