The Big 2013 Project

Let me preface by saying, I didn't ask my parents for anything for this past Christmas. They got me a book. It was like they could read between the lines of phone calls and emails we've done this past year. This was one of those books that come into your life at just the right moment. I finished in 2-3 days. I am going on a trip of sorts this year, and calling it my Personal Happiness Mission Project. I've been dealing with issues of self-image, a sense of loss of self and trying to figure out exactly who I am and what I like and not just define myself as mother/wife/friend, and even dealing with depression for years. I never quite recovered from the first round of postpartum depression after Ivy or after Collin's pre-and post-diagnosis, but I've also had issues since I was a little kid and the depression in my experience has been tangled into my post-traumatic stress disorder. During this past year, I haven't been able to get myself to be able to do some of my favorite things. It's like Lucy says in  A Charlie Brown Christmas "The fact that you recognize you have a problem, means you are not too far gone."

So, this book I got for Christmas is called "M2B: Mission to be happy." It has been quite the eye-opener with some of the principles.

• Don't make happiness dependent on any person, event, etc.
• The concept of "feel your feet"(be present in the moment instead of stuck in the past or waiting on the future) that I learned at TOFW in May
• Reminiscing of happy times, or doing things that make us happy
• Every moment can be a chance to expect an unexpected joy
• Eliminate forces in our lives that are not bringing out best out, or that are bringing us down
• Instead of emulating people that we compare our weaknesses to their strengths, increase faith and knowledge of the Savior and Heavenly Father since that's who we are trying to become like in this life
• Stuff won't make us happy. Service, thoughtfulness, friendship, forgiveness will
• Gratefulness/appreciation for what you do have when times are tough

So, this year, with my "trip" I will be journaling unexpected joys, surprising service that made me happier than I thought, personal pampering that works, people/things I'm giving the toodle-oo to, diversities that make me smile, oooooooooooooooooooh moments, gifts I've received that make me smile, gifts I've given that make me smile.

For me, there's not too many people to say "toodle-oo" to, but there are things in my daytime routine that are big distractions, time wasters, and not getting me any closer to my goals.